Let’s All Ditch Having a “Magical” Holiday Season for Something Even Better?

Hi, friends,

It’s the most *something* time of the year, amirite?

The gifting, the lights, the treats, the cheer!

Yes, December can be a lot. A sort of peppermint-y overstimulation bomb wrapped in a tangled, guilt-trippy bow of non-stop to-dos.

There’s a lot to love about this time of the year. But there’s also a lot to loathe if you’re a mama trying to make all the things happen for your family. The stress. The overwhelm. The communicating and the planning and the keeping track of all details.

In some senses this season can feel like the literal definition of “magical.” As if I’m trying to pull off a feat, some kind of trick that will reveal life as more cheerful, more kind, more exciting than it seems at first glance.

Looking back, I can see that I’ve spent many an exhausting holiday season in my wizarding robe, waving my wand wildly in an attempt to make everyone’s season “bright.”

While it’s fun to make the holidays feel special, there’s a cost to the pressure I too often put on myself with all the summoning and consuming and creating and perfecting I get caught up in this time of year: feeling present in my own life.

I eye with despair my overflowing “plate” of tasks, then despise my despair because I want to enjoy my life this month not resent it.

When musing about ways to get out of this tangle last week, I began to let my mind wonder… what if?

What if the “magic” of the season is already, somehow, here?

And what if it isn’t my responsibility at all to “make it” for everyone else?

What if the invitation this month isn’t to lose myself in a frenzy of Christmas-ing but, rather, to slow down and pay enough attention to enjoy whatever is right here in this moment?

When I consider the possibility that all the grace, beauty, fun, joy needed for the season is already here, without my having to contort myself or manufacture a thing, I can feel my whole body relax—shoulders drop, breath quieter.

The idea of “going slow” in a month when my calendar is lit up like a Christmas tree with a dozen extra parties, concerts, trips, and tasks seems absurd on its face.

But “slow” doesn’t have to mean literally stopping all movement. Slow can also be a mindset. When I posted online about my holiday dilemma,

Anna Hewitt

from

Basil and Honey

kindly reminded me, “We don’t have to always feel rushed or too busy, even if there is a lot to do.”

Such a helpful concept! It’s inspired a note-to-self that I commit to reading daily:

Dear Marika,

Feeling stressed is optional. While there might be a lot that you feel like you have to do or want to do in this season, this month you can practice opting out of stress by simply reminding yourself that you don’t have to pressure yourself to magic up perfect holiday goodness for your people.

You are allowed and invited at any moment to slow life down to .5 or .75x to let any bits of joy, peace, and love that might be floating around find you and nourish you. And this practice, as you make your way through this busy, beautiful month, might just be all the magic that’s needed.

I would love to hear the ways that you try to stay present (or sane!) this season. I’m all ears in the comments below!